Comments for Nefesh - shul with soul

Comment on Is Your Religion the True One? by Mim

Mim — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 10:24:18 +0000

I have to agree with Ruth above, what a wonderful, succinct and heart-warming response to the questioner… and the readers too.

Comment on Can I Keep My Maiden Name? by Julia

Julia — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 23:40:39 +0000

If it were men giving up their name, would it be a ’small ask’? Always the women making sacrifices for ‘family unity’.

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by JOSH

JOSH — Fri, 19 Mar 2010 15:22:45 +0000

Everyone is coming out of the woodwork to give their example of how intermarriage has worked for them. Like the Rabbi said, intermarriage is not good for the Jews (plural), not for the Jew. So there are some cases were a Jew has had fulfillment in intermarriage. Good for you! I’m glad it worked out! However, if EVERY Jew does this then with out a doubt not only will we not maintain our Jewish identity; Judaism will not be intrinsic in our souls.
We are so fortunate to live in these extremely free communities yet we have to be careful. Jews have married Jews for as long as they have because it was so obvious to ourselves and to others that we are Jewish. Now in the secular world, it is not so obvious. We look, dress, talk, and behave, like other non-Jews, so our Jewish identity is deteriorating. It has led to intermarriage and has caused less Judaism to be in our children’s hearts and souls. So in general we need to keep our numbers up! It’s business! So if 1 or 2 out of 10 intermarry, great! I hope it works out! The Rabbi is right, and it is out of your own ego and arrogance that you would criticize him.
Also, there is nothing wrong with other religions! When I marry my JEWISH girlfriend, many of our groomsmen and bridesmaids will be Non-Jewish. These are people we have very deep relationships and bonds with, who we love and respect very much. Some of them come to Seders in April, and we go decorate this one family’s Christmas tree with them in December. My one Christian friend is even a Republican and we still love him!… The point is that we are talking about MARRIAGE not relationships and treatment of others. Marriage is the unification of souls. On the mystical level, if your souls are intrinsically different, how can they match? They are like two puzzle pieces that don’t fit. If that is too Jewish or deep of an understanding of marriage for you, then on the more surface level, you are Jewish, you descend from a long line of Jews, so why break that chain of faith? After all that our people have been through and suffered, it is kind of arrogant and egomaniacal to do whatever you want with your life. Obviously it is your life and you can do what you want with it, but your ancestors have struggled and suffered so that you could have the life of freedom you have, and its irresponsible to feel like you don’t owe them anything. Passover is coming up, when we learn that FREEDOM COMES WITH RESPONSIBILITY. You have a responsibility, Jews, so be responsible…

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by Ariel

Ariel — Tue, 09 Mar 2010 01:51:48 +0000

I’m reminded of a debate in the 1980s between Alan Dershowitz and the late Rabbi Meir Kahane.
Kahane lambasted anyone who says they want their children to marry Jews for no definable reason as racists who seem to have an ethnic preferance.
His point was that Jews have no reason to marry Jews unless it is because they want to build a Jewish home based on Torah (not necessarily meaning all 613 mitzvot) and to continue that tradition which began thousands of years ago.

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by Ray

Ray — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 03:48:23 +0000

I think the story of Esther tells us that you sometimes have to do G-d’s work in different ways.

I grew up in Bondi in the sixties. The horrors of The Holocaust were never far from any of our family gatherings and Israel was frequently under threat of annihilation. My Bar-Mitvah class was obsessed with sex & repopulating worldwide Jewry.

However, we had become true soulmates before the inevitable question popped up. Complete opposites – Jewish & Catholic! “Guess who’s coming to dinner?” Ouch! Advice from generally supportive friends ranged from “There are so many Jews in New York, don’t worry about it” to “You both have the same G-d”

In a bizarre twist of fate,after 30 years of marriage & 4 beautiful Catholic Jewish children, it turns out that her maternal great grandmother was probably Jewish. If you go back far enough …………..

We married for love. Neither of us changed religion. I am still a Jew and she is still a devout Catholic. We believe in the same G-d. We our planning to visit New York soon.

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by Lisa

Lisa — Sat, 06 Mar 2010 01:12:09 +0000

I too had a very strong reaction to this article. I also married a non Jewish man. This man is by far the most spiritual person I have ever come across in my life. Not in a religious way, but deep in his soul. He is incredibly respectful of my beliefs, is involved in all of our family traditions and wants to bring our children up as Jewish. My husband is the most incredible man I have ever met in my life, his religion is not important, his soul is important. Most importantly, since I met him, I am the happiest and most fulfilled I have ever felt in my life. Surely Judaisim wants their people to be happy?

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by shlomo

shlomo — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 20:34:11 +0000

I would hope that people who read the Rabbis emails unserstand that the Rabbi is a man of god. Being that he is unable to provide hatred to any of gods creations. To even suggest that Rabbi Moss is hinting at anything close to bogotry or hatred is ridiculous.

Good Shabbas

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by Rafael

Rafael — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 19:42:46 +0000

What about Moshe marrying Tziporah? What about King Solomon and the Queen of Sheba? Aren’t these examples of intermarriage that were good for the Jews, or at least not bad for the Jews?

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by Jeremy

Jeremy — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 15:20:39 +0000

I just want to clarify, that while I disagree with Orthodox theology, I accept it’s right to exist. What I don’t accept is it’s insistence that ONLY it has the right to exist.

Comment on Is Intermarriage Good for the Jews? by Jeremy

Jeremy — Fri, 05 Mar 2010 15:15:47 +0000

Rabbi Moss,

I sense here a very narrow definition of what is ‘good for the Jews’ – namely that they will keep a strict fundamentalist-dogmatic interpretation of Jewish scriptures.

I also sense a very narrow definition of Jewishness, namely one that a narrow halachic definition espouses.

I also sense a strong judgement against those Jews that don’t follow this strict dogmatic-halachic understanding of Jewishness, with the article insisting that they have ’strayed’ and are still not ‘exempt’ from their ‘obligations’.

I think what the Jewish people need most is unity, which can only be achieved through acceptance of the validity of each others differing views.

In the bigger picture, what’s more important than Jews marrying only Jews is that Jews are inspired in their Jewishness, and are contributing to humanity in ‘their’ Jewish way. Intermarriage has no influence on this as it’s something that is part of one’s essense (etzem mahuto).

I see many of the problems with Jewish identity today as a result of the strictly legalistic-fundamentalist-dogmatic approach to Jewishness – i.e. Orthodoxy – and it’s claim to be the only valid understanding of Jewishness.

Hillel didn’t stand on one foot and proclaim – ‘Legalistic pilpul is the essense of Judaism’. He said, “That which is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow. That is the whole Torah; the rest is the explanation; go and learn.” I take from this that any interpretation of scripture that is hateful to someone has lost sight of the bigger picture.

You wouldn’t want someone to negatively judge the validity of your marriage, or your life choices and beliefs, so why negatively judge the validity and choices of those who disagree with your understanding of Jewishness?